Arm Replacement Table

Only three sessions into our Lamentations of the Flame Princess game, and already two different PCs have lost an arm in combat (all thanks to Cavegirl's Horrible Wounds rules).

That's awesome!

So now they're planning on making another trip to the Ghoul Market to visit the Skinsmith. I get the feeling the PCs are going to give the him a lot of repeat business with limb replacement. Of course, that crafty old demon likes to improvise with these sort of operations, and you rarely leave with the arm you hoped to get.

Time to make a new table!

When you visit the Skinsmith to replace an arm, pay 1d6x100sp and roll 1d12 on the table below: 

Oh my god! What has the Skinsmith replaced my arm with?

1. Scaly, clawed demon arm (1d4 damage from claws)
2. Suckered tentacle (+5’ reach).
3. Skeleton arm with mummified sinews.
4. Some H. R. Giger biomechanical monstrosity.
5. Thorny, leafy, plant-like limb (can grow into a sword, 1d8 damage).
6. A snake! (Bite only does 1 damage, but target must make a save vs poison or take damage equal to 2d4 + your CON bonus).
7. Wooden puppet arm.
8. Zombie/Frankenstien arm (you take 1d3 damage from holy water).
9. Surprisingly sophisticated clockwork prosthetic (+1 to Tinkering).
10. Green-skinned mutant arm with grotesque, over-large muscles (+1 damage with weapons wielded with this arm).
11. Child’s arm (-1 to hit with this arm).
12. An actual adult human arm, you lucky FREAK!

With a few easy adjustments, you can also use this table for replacement legs, genitals, or whatever.

Ashes of Angels: Down in the Ghoul Market (LotFP Session 2)

Our second Lamentations of the Flame Princess session had less action than the first, but involved a lot more roleplaying and offered some much desired decompression. The group layed low and recuperated for a few days, met the new party members, then traveled to the nearby village of Nonsbeck (poor, doomed, Nonsbeck), buried their dead, and visited the Ghoul Market.

I was very conflicted about introducing the Ghoul Market so early into the campaign. My instinct with these sort of games is to introduce the horrific and fantastic elements slowly, so they remain weird an alien. I was afraid of making the ghouls and devils of the Market too familiar and thus reduce their effectiveness. On the other hand, one of the problems I had with my old D&D 5^th Edition game was that I waited too long to introduce all the weird stuff, and certainly Dungeon Crawl Classics doesn’t worry about that sort of thing. In the end, I decided to throw caution to the wind. If the ghouls wind up seeming too much like “people,” then I guess that will just make the real alien horrors even more alien.

Our Cast

• Belinda Kage: Serpent Blood 1, Midwife. (Starts the session with a broken blade thru her head.)
• Madeline: Specialist 1, Grave Robber. (Starts the session missing an arm.)
• Mortimer: Alice 1, Librarian. (Starts the session moderately wounded, but relatively intact.)
• “Matthew”: Outlander 1, Iriquois warrior and former slave. (New PC)
• Julius Cervantes: Fighter 1, Former witch hunter. (New PC)

NPCs

• Ana Fischer: Rescued witch, secret Satanist. (Starts the session with horrific facial and body burns.)
• Deacon Girnot: A sleazy weasel of a man, deacon of Nonsbeck's only church

Spoilers for ObsceneSerpent Religion 2 ahead.

The session starts with Belinda, Madline, Mortimer, and Ana tending to their wounds. Once everyone is on their feet, they gather up the bodies of the dead from last session. They pile their enemies’ corpses into a great big pyre. They bury their dead comrades Hector and Tranquilo in the snow so they keep relatively fresh until they can get a proper burial.

As the survivors keep warm by the pyre, Belinda notices Ana gathering up the charred remnants of the book she was to burned with. The accused witch is barely holding back tears and seems distraught. Belinda recognizes the scraps as the remains of a spellbook. She confides in the witch that she too is a spellcaster, and promises to help her recompile her lost spell book. This earns her Ana’s gratitude and (for now) loyalty.

Meanwhile, Julius and Matthew have been traveling together for few days, and notice the warm glow of a fire and the smell of cooking meat coming from the ruins of the old Roman fort. They ride up to the camp and announce themselves. The grizzled Spaniard and dusky-skinned warrior from the New World surprise the group of survivors, but Julius and Matthew are just as surprised by the horrifically mutilated quartet before them. Questions are made and explanations are offered, but eventually the two groups of misfits decide to join forces. PC party reestablished!

The party has pretty decent shelter and plenty of food in the ruins of the fort, so they decide to recover here for a few days until everyone is properly healed up. Belinda’s chirurgy skills help speed this along. While the wounded rest, Matthew and Julius keep watch. On the third day, a rabid bear wanders out of the forest and jumps on a nearby deer (random encounter!). The PCs don’t believe the fort’s crumbling walls will keep the bear out, so they quickly hustle everyone indoors and try to wrangle their horses into a tower. One of the horses gets spooked and breaks free, running off. The rabid bear gives chase!

Matthew and Julius decide the bear is too much of a threat to leave alive so they open fire with their muskets, cycling through extra guns while Mortimer (who’s fully healed at this point) reloads for them. The angry bear charges towards them, making its way through the large gaps in the fort wall. Musket balls hit a few more times, but it gets within melee range before they can completely drop it. Julius’s spear catches the bear as it charges, striking a devastating wound, but the maddened beast will fight to the death! Matthew leaps at the bear with his French tomahawk, and the bear turns on the Iroquois. The beast’s claws and teeth savage his flesh, tearing flesh away from his hand and arm (luckily he makes his poison save, and doesn’t catch rabies).  Desperate, Matthew lashes out with his dagger in his good hand while Julius stabs and stabs again with his spear. Finally the rabid beast falls. Matthew crawls out to join the rest of the convalescing PCs, while Mortimer and Julius drag the diseased carcas away from the fort.

The next few days are peaceful, and eventually everyone is back on their feet. Before they leave the fort, they decide to explore the secret tunnel in the jail cell below. They use Madeline’s pick and shovel to work on widening the tunnel, while the rangy Matthew crawls ahead on his belly with a lantern pushed ahead of him. The outlander discovers that the tunnel connects to an ancient Roman aqueduct, knee deep with cold, clean water. After some debate, the PCs decide not to explore the aqueduct for now and prepare to head east towards the village of Nonsbeck. Maybe they’ll find some work there. They bundle up the bodies of their dead friends and head down the road.

On the road to Nonsbeck, they come across a man pulling a wagon load of dead bodies to a nearby mass grave (random encounter!). Apparently a nearby village (not Nonsbeck) has been recently wiped out by the Red Plague (seting up The Punchline for later). He offers to take their friends’ corpses off their hands (“Plenty of room on the old cart!”) but the PCs decline and give the man their farewells.

Eventually, they make their way to Nonsbeck, a pleasant little village that would certainly never fall prey to demonic terror.  The whole place is decorated for Christmas and seems perfectly pleasant. The hilltop church of St. Margaret is their first stop. They are greeted by Deacon Girnot, a greasy weasel of a character who is not at all pleased to see a bunch of mutilated weirdos on the church’s doorstep. The good priest Father Cristof, however is more friendly to strangers and ushers them into the church. The PCs explain (lie) that they were attacked on the road and two of their friends were killed, and hope the priest could give them a proper burial. Father Cristof is saddened by their tale. Of course he’ll arrange for burial first thing in the morning. For now, they can keep the bodies in the shed where Girnot sleeps. The deacon is not at all pleased to be put out of his room by a bunch of strange corpses.

The party’s next stop is the stable where they meet the friendly stable boy Reiner. They pay him for a week’s worth of stabling in advance, as they plan on staying here for a bit. Then it’s off to the inn for some food and rest. The inn is busy this night. A group of farmers drinks mulled ale and sings Christmas songs. A small group of five soldiers are spending the night here while on their way to Berlin, a merchant and his guards have made this their stop for the night, and two travelling nuns also have rooms. 

The party makes arrangements to rent the last two rooms and settle in to eat. While they are eating, Belinda notices that the soldiers are starting to get “handsy” with Gela, the nice young barmaid. The buxom redheaded serpentblood saddles over to the soldiers and snags their attention away from the younger girl. While the soldiers thusly distracted, Belinda takes some of the opium form her chirurgy kit and spikes the soldiers’ beer. Soon the soldiers are all unconscious, and the inn is a much more pleasant place.

Meanwhile, Julius talks to the nuns. They are on their way to the convent of St. Agnes, about a day away. The men escorting them along the road have abandoned them, and it’s a dangerous world out there. Julius offers the party’s aid in escorting them, if they are willing to wait a few days. The older nun decides that arriving late is better than arriving dead, so they reluctantly agree to wait for the PCs to finish their business.

The next morning, Father Cristoff performs a nice but simple funeral for Tranquilo and Hector. The party springs for a couple of nice headstones (and the money so spent becomes XP for their new characters, Matthew and Julius). While in the cemetery, Madeline notices a large monument bearing a statue of the Virgin Mother. It is clearly old as it is covered in moss and the inscriptions have long worn away. But on the back of this monument she sees a white ankh, the sign of the ghoul market!

The party spends the rest of the day lazing about the town or chopping wood for extra silver. But when night falls, they head back to the cemetery to investigate the marked monument. It’s starless and bible black. The moon is nothing but a thin sliver behind the clouds, and all the lights are out in the village. The only sound is deacon Girnot’s snoring from his nearby shed. They manage to find the monument again, and Madeline works her shovel into a crack in the base. She moves a slab away to reveal narrow, steep stairs descending into the cold earth. Madeline, Beleinda, Mortimer, and Ana head down into the foggy darkness. Matthew doesn’t wish to walk on burial land, and Julius feels guilty about desecrating the dead, so they decide to stay topside and stand guard. We have split the party!

The stairs widen and grow less steep as the quartet descends, but it still takes them 30 minutes to reach the bottom. The stairs lead to a large tunnel filled with low-fog and shards of old bone. They refill their lantern and press on.

Topside, Matthew and Julius grow worried. Their friends have been down there for a half-an-hour or more. The decide that deacon Girnot (that sleazy weasel) must know something. They sneak into his shed and awake him with a sword held to his throat. Girnot looks up in fear. “Did Agamot send you?” Who? The PCs have never heard of this man. After some graphic threats and a failed Morale check, they learn the truth. Girnot stole a book from a wizard in Heidelberg named Agamot. He suspects the wizard has sent people after him. “What’s buried under this cemetery? Who’s buried under the Madonna gravestone?” they demand. Girnot claims he doesn’t know. The grave’s been here longer than anyone remembers. He doesn’t think there’s anything under the cemetery other than more dirt and worms. Matthew and Julius don’t quite believe him, so they grab the deacon and frog-march him to the cemetery and drag him with them as they head down the stairs to the Ghoul Market.

Meanwhile, deep below the earth, the first group continues down the tunnel for an hour before it comes to a large cavern. A wall of skulls stretches across the cavern, and two statues of faceless angels form an entrance arch with their wings. Black-bannered market stalls are scattered among crumbling crypts and mausoleums of ancient design. Green flames burn in large iron lanterns suspended from the ceiling. The smell of rot, spices, and cooking meat fills the air. The dead and damned wander the isles, buying and selling. This is the Ghoul Market!

The PCs walk to the central square. They can feel hungry eyes watching them, but they use the timeless social tactic of “acting like we belong here." Belinda still has a sword blade through her head and rough stiches across her face, and the cenobite look helps sell the illusion. The central square features a dry fountain with a large statue of a nude medusa. Behind that lies Cold Ethyl’s Pleasure House, a desecrated cathedral of black stone with a crucified nude woman writhing and moaning on the cross in ecstasy.  The PCs decide to ignore that for now and follow a road sign towards the Skinsmith.

In the cavern of the Skinsmith, they are greeted by a robed dwarf with a patchwork face, one of the Skinsmith’s minions. Of course they will be able to fix Madeline's arm and repair Belinda and Ana’s scarred faces. Sadly the party does not have enough money. But the dwarf is glad to inform them that the Exchequer will trade them silver for parts of their vital essence (250sp per attribute point permanently sold). The PCs have some scores they aren’t really using, so this sounds like a good deal to them. They chit-chat with the dwarf for a bit before leaving, and find out that a human wizard known as Lord Prospero frequents the Ghoul Market. They file this info for later.

As they leave to find the Exchequer, they run into Matthew and Julius, who have finally arrived in the Market. They have Girnot all tied up so they look like slavers (“so we look like we belong). The party is reunited, so they all head to the Exchequer for some easy money.

The Exchequer has a tent in the main square. He is a hulking creature in dusty yellow robes with a cage of fire where his head should be. The PCs have a new idea. Since Girnot is their "slave" now, his Essence is theirs to sell! Plus, if they reduce his Intelligence and Charisma low enough, he won’t be able to tell anyone what the PCs have been doing (“And if he dies, well, he doesn’t seem like someone anyone will miss.”). The Exchequer pulls silver cobwebs out of Girnot’s face, reducing his INT and CHA to 4 and 3, respectively. The deacon is now very stupid and poorly spoken, and the party is several thousand silver oboli richer.

Pleased with themselves, the party heads back to the Skinsmith. Madeline wants her old arm re-attached, but it’s too far gone. Instead, the great cyclopean demon gives her a new arm covered in green scales and orange hair, ending in a taloned claw (1d4 damage!). Belinda doesn’t quite trust the Skinsmith to remove the blade from her head (and she kind of likes the cenobite look), so she just has him grind the metal down so it’s not sticking out any more. Ana whispers something in the demon’s ear (she’s actually in league with Satan, remember, though the PCs still don’t know this). The Skinsmith nods in ascent. When he’s done with his work, Ana’s hair and skin is replaced. She’s beautiful, but her skin has a weird too-tight almost-artificial look to it.

Next, it’s off to the antiquities and sundries section of the market. Belinda buys magical inks and psychoactives so Ana can begin to make copies of Belinda’s spells. Julius buys a lightweight coat of bone chainmail from a purple woman of Carcosa. Madeline buys a glove to cover her demon hand. It’s here that the PC’s hear a hissing, hungry voice behind them “You look like you’re new to the Ghoul Market, how delicious.” A group of six hungry ghouls have come up behind them. The rest of the market looks on with interest. When the PCs came to the market, there was a 1-in-8 chance of them running into “hungry complications” from the patrons. Each time they went someplace new, this chance went up by 1. They were lucky for a long time, but I finally rolled low enough for the ghouls to make their move. “You don’t have a Writ of Protection,” says the lead ghoul. “That means you’re meat for the taking. But we’ll give you a break, just give us one of your number and leave.”

I fully expected my players to hand over Grinot, but they are craftier than that. “I wouldn’t mess with us! We’re on business for Agamot the wizard.”

“Agamot? Who’s that?”

“He’s a friend of the great Lord Prospero?”

“Oh really?” Says the ghoul, “Well Prospero is right over there. Let’s go ask him.” 

Sure enough,  since they are in the antiquities section of the Market, Lord Prospero is here with his servant Catherwood. Prospero is a decadent Vincent Price sort of wizard, and Catherwood is a stooped old man carrying a large cabinet full of Prospero’s goods. Both wear a scroll around their necks that reads: “The bearer of this writ of protection shall be afforded all the hospitality and safety due a guest of Prince Dracula and his official representatives.”

Prospero is drunk and in a good mood, but he doesn’t corform to the PCs’ lies. “I assure you that amateur Agamot is no friend of mine!” The party quickly explains that Girnot stole one of the rival wizard’s books. “Well in that case, anyone who causes Agamot such irritation is certainly welcome in my company!” He extends his one-time protection to the PCs for the night, and the hungry ghouls slink off disappointed. The party talks with Prospero for a bit. They find the libertine wizard charming, and he finds the adventurers amusing. He invites them to come visit him in his castle sometime “And bring that book of Agamot’s. I will pay you well for it!”

The party has made a new friend and finished their shopping while narrowly avoiding being eaten by ghouls. They decide they’ve pushed their luck enough for one night and leave the Market. The PCs emerge from the cemetery just as dawn breaks over Nonsbeck.

Treasure Gained:

• Nothing that earned them XP, but..
• 300sp in Ghoul Market oboli, left over from shopping
• Carcosan bone mail that protects like chain but encumbers like leather.
• Friendship... the real treasure.

Graveyard:

• No one new this session!
• Tranquilo (Fighter 1)
• Hector (Alice 1)

What's for Sale at the Ghoul Market?

Vacant Ritual Assembly is an OSR zine put out by Clint Krause and Red Moon Medicine Show. Issue #1 came out in 2014, and (among other things) describes the Ghoul Market. The Ghoul Market is an underground bazzar when denizens of the underworld ply their wares. 

As described in the zine: Beneath a defiled chapel, the scavengers of the dead emerge from their tunnels to barter with the living and the damned. Inhuman travelers peruse black-shrouded stalls and dine on artisanal cadavers.

I love the Ghoul Market, and I'm very excited that my players will be visiting it soon. According to the article, at any time 1d10 magic items can be found for sale at the Ghoul Market (I will drop that to 1d6). This gave me the flmsy excuse to come up with a bunch of interesting magic items of low-to-middle power that I canuse to seperate the PCs from their money. 

Below is my list of random magic items. Many of them are one-use, so they shouldn't throw off the pwer balance too much. I just kind of eye-balled the prices based on magic item construction costs in the LotFP book. I don't claim that the prices are mathematically perfect. The list includes 16 new magic items, along with a boring old healing potion, plus random scrolls, wands, and spellbooks. 

Most of these items are sold by Handsome Gamal, a strangely charismatic, partially mummified ghoul who wears dusty old silks and tarnished gold jewelry. He will absolutely not warn his customers about the negative aspects of any of his goods.

Use and enjoy!

Random Magic Items from the Ghoul Market

1) Dead Man’s Tobacco

• Sticky, foul-smelling, black tobacco in a skin pouch.
• Blow smoke into corpse’s mouth to speak with dead.
• Ask 3 questions. Corpse can be dead for any amount of time, but mouth, lips, and tongue must be intact.
• Price: 1000sp per dose

2) Bottled Undead Faerie

• Emaciated gray faerie with piranha teeth in a smoky glass bottle.
• Feed blood to make faerie glow with light only donor can see, illuminating like a lantern. 1 turn per hp of blood.
• One use only, then the faire turns to ash.
• Price: 1000sp

3) Hand of Glory

• Mummified left hand of a hanged man. Dipped in human tallow and wicks placed in each finger to make a macabre handle.
• Casts sleep on everyone in a house. Lasts 1 turn per finger
• Price: 7000sp

4) Zombie Wine

• Black bottle of think, glowing green liquor.
• Feed to a corpse to create 2HD zombie. Loyal to the person who fed it the wine, for now. (Loyalty starts at 12. Loyalty is reduced by 1 each night. Test loyalty every midnight.)
• Price: 1000sp

5) Burglar Worms

• 1d6 Finger-sized green maggots kept in a tin box of rotten soil.
• Automatically opens any key-based lock in 1d10 rounds, then turns into fat disgusting (but harmless) fly.
• Price: 500sp per worm.

6) Basilisk Powder

• One dose of course gray powder in a small silk pouch.  
• Mix with wine and drink. Save or turn to stone until dawn. The drinker can voluntarily fail the save.
• Price: 1000sp

7) Black Cherub Feather

• Large black feather with a razor-sharp quill.
• Jab it into your flesh to heal all damage, poison, or disease, but every prepubescent creature in a 1d6 mile radius suffers the damage and maladies you just cured.
• Price: 2000sp

8) Mummy Dust

• Fine, greasy powder like gray talc in a pocket-sized clay sarcophagus.
• Mix with water and drink. You become immune to normal weapons for 1d4 turns.
• You take triple damage from fire.
• You cannot benefit from cleric spells, and can be turned/destroyed as undead.
• You take 1d6 CON damage per turn of duration after effect ends (save vs posion for half).
• Price:  2000sp

9) Love Potion

• Blood-red syrup that smells of opium and rancid meat in a clay vessel with two spouts.  
• Someone drinks half, someone else drinks the other half. If both fail their saves vs. poison, the two fall madly in love until the spring equinox.
• Price: 500sp

10) Satyr Juice

• Milky, pearlescent potion in an obscene brass flask.
• The next time the drinker has sex, they will become pregnant regardless of sex, health, or biology.
• Price: 500sp

11) Memory Mirror

• Small silver hand mirror decorated with Greek goddesses.
• Reflects the image of the last person to look into it.
• Cost: 3000sp

12) Inquisitor Cobra

• Three-foot long cobra with a grey-and black hide and a yellow cross on its hood.
• Whisper a question to the cobra and point to another person. The cobra will ask that person the question. If they answer truthfully, the cobra bites them. (+4 to hit, 4d6 CON damage. Save vs poison for half.)
• After each question, roll 1d6. On a 1, cobra says “My work here is done!” and dies.
• Price: 2000sp

13) Brass Goat Statue

• Fist-sized sculpture of a shaggy goat with large horns and a curious expression on its face.
• Weights 15lbs, but somehow doesn’t take up an encumbrance slot.
• Through subtle space warpage, allows the character to carry 5 more items before gaining their first encumbrance point (using LotFP encumbrance rules).
• Once per day (at 1d24 o’clock), 1-in-6 chance of “eating” a random item the PC is carrying.
• This chance grows by 1 per day until the goat eats something, then resets to 1-in-6.
• Price: 2000sp

14) Ghost Shroud

• Old and dusty funeral shroud of stained gray linen.
• Wrap it around yourself and become ethereal, invisible, silent, and can fly for 1d6 turns.
• At the end of the duration, roll 2d6+CHA modifier.
• 10+: You return to normal, and assuming you weren’t in flight or inside a solid object, you’re fine.
• 7-9: You return to normal, as above, but you’ve lost something in the ethereal plane.
• 6 or less: You are forever lost in the ethereal, and something returns to the physical world in your place.
• Price: 6000sp

15) Wolf Heart Woad

• Thick purple paste in a small bone jar.
• Spend 1 round smearing on your face and eyes.
• At the start of the next round, before initiative is rolled, you turn into a wolfman.
• This transformation destroys your clothes and armor, and you drop the rest of your gear.
• While transformed you act on your own initiative roll. You have an AC of 14 (+DEX modifier). You are immune to fear and charm effects.
• You take double damage from silver weapons, and are burned by holy water (1d6 damage).
• Your movement speed is increased by 50% (180’ in LotFP).
• You have +2 to attack, and can make two claw attacks for 1d6 damage each.
• Every round you must attack the nearest living target, friend or foe, or move towards the nearest target.
• You can suppress this bloodlust for 1 round with a successful save vs magic (-2 at night, -4 if the moon is full).
• The transformation ends after 1d4 turns, or you’ve been unable to attack someone (successful or not) for 6 rounds.
• Price: 2000sp

16) Nice and  Pleasant Tea Kettle

• A small tin tea kettle painted with simple blue and yellow flowers.
• The kettle can make up to 4 cups of tea at a time, in the usual fashion.
• Once per day, you can brew an usually pleasant batch of tea. A wounded person drinking a cup of this unusually pleasant tea heals 1 hp.
• A person can only benefit from this unusually pleasant tea once per day, and the tea loses potency if it grows cold.
• You must provide your own water, heat, and tea leaves.
• This is one of the rare magic items with no horrible side effects.
• Price: 2000sp

17) Medical Potion 

• Bitter brew, thick and black, in a leather flask
• Drink to heal 1d6+1 damage.
• Price: 300sp each, 1d3 flasks available

18) Wand

• Random spell: level 1-3; 4d6 charges
• Price: spell level x charges x 600sp

19) Spell Scroll

• Roll 1d6: 1-4 wizard spell, 5-6 cleric scroll.
• Random spell and level.
• Price: 500sp per spell level

20) Spell Book

• Contains 1d6 random spells of random levels
• Price:  total spell levels x 1000sp

Ashes of Angels: Session 1 (LotFP campaign)

Last weekend I ran the first session of our new Lamentations of the Flame Princess campaign, prenteously called “Ashes of Angels.” This session served as a short session 0 where we went through character creation, discussed setting info and themes, and acclimatized our new player to the group. Character creation went fairly quickly, with shopping taking up most of the time. It went a bit quicker at the end of the session, when a couple of players rolled up new characters.

I had my players roll 3d6 straight down the line for the stats, and let them swap two scores. If they still didn’t like those numbers, I allowed them to take those numbers and make a loyal 0-level retainer for their PC and use a pre-determined array of numbers to plug in where they wanted (13, 12, 10, 9, 9, 6). I mockingly called this this “Premade Array for Baby Cowards.” I was delighted that all my players decided to play their rolls where they lay (with the optional swap). No henchmen for this group yet!

Here’s the initial party:

• Madeline: Specialist and grave robber (played by Erik)
• Belinda Kage: Serpentblood and midwife (played by IvyLynn)
• Mortimer: Alice and librarian (played by Pockets)
• Tranquilo: Fighter and conscripted sailor (played by Reamer) DEAD
• Hector: Alice and orphan (played by Jamison) DEAD

Two Alices! Unfotunately, they didn’t start out with any crazy powers.

I took Zak’s advice and started the campaign with the party in a dungeon. The last thing they remembered was being in Berlin, when they blacked out or were knocked unconscious. Sometime later they wake up in a cold jail cell stripped of all their gear and weapons.

“Psst… Are you awake?” says a voice in the dim light of a single torch. As the party awakes, they look through the bars of their cell to the other cell across the hall. There sits Ana Fischer, a young blonde woman, “country pretty” in tattered clothes and showing clear signs of torture. “We must get out of here before the witch hunter returns!”

The party begins examining their surroundings, looking for a way out. Madeline finds an old bronze cloak pin under a pile of moldy straw. Maybe it will serve as a make-shift lock pick? Meanwhile, Belinda detects a slight draft coming from a crack in corner wall of the cell.

Unfortunately for them, this is old-style D&D! Searching an area or picking a lock takes a full 10 minute turn. Before they can try to unlock their door, the witch hunter, Lazarus Holtz (cleric 2), arrives with a couple of goons (0-level).

“Good, I see you heretics are awake,” sneers the witch hunter. “Fear not, I have thumbscrews enough for all of you. You will all confess your crimes in time. But first, Frau Fischer has an appointment with the stake.” The goons drag Ana kicking and screaming out of her cell. The party try to taunt Holtz and his men closer to the bars so they can grab them, but the witch hunter is too crafty and cautious. The PCs ineffectively pelt the villains with rotten straw and pebbles, as Holtz and company leave with Ana.

Now the PCs feel like they have a time limit if they want to save the pretty peasant girl (they do!). Thankfully, Holtz is long winded, and they can hear him chanting litanies and accusations somewhere above them. Madeline picks the lock on the cell door, while Belinda removes a few bricks in the corner of the cell to find a narrow tunnel that leads into the dark where they hear and smell running water. The tunnel is too cramped for some of the larger party members to fit through (specifically Tranquilo, whose 18 CON makes him pretty beefy, and Belinda, whose player previously described as “broad and curvy”). They decide to take the safer route through the open door.

A store room near the cell reveals one of Holtz’s henchmen under a blanket, dead from vicious wounds that the PCs can’t quite identify. Sadly the body has no weapons on it. Looking quickly in Ana’s cell, they only find an old steel bucket full of stinking human waste. For now it is the party’s only weapon.

The party sneaks down the hallway and around the corner where thy find another store room and hear voices in low conversation. Hector the Alice sneaks ahead to check out the voices, while the others examine the store room. They find a few barrels of dried beans and horse feed, as well as a small barrel of gunpowder and (more importantly) a variety of shovels and other tools they can use as makeshift weapons (1d6 damage!). Hector discovers that the voices belong to a couple of Holtz’s goons who are patiently cataloging the party’s stolen gear. A plan is quickly formed.

Hector spreads the liquid waste from the bucket along the hallway floor while the rest of the party hides behind the storeroom door or around the corner. Hector then starts banging on the wall with his shovel, attracting the attention of one of the goons. When the goon sees Hector, he draws his sword and charges, fails his saving throw, slips on the filth, and slides toward the store room door, where Hector splatters his head with a shovel (100 xp for the first kill of the campaign!). The second goon is quickly dispatched before he can raise an alarm. Flush with victory, the party quickly recovers their gear and heads upstairs just as Holtz wraps up his “let’s burn a witch” ritual.

The stairs lead up to the ground floor of a small ruined tower in an old Roman fort. They PCs peek out into the overgrown courtyard. It’s dark and heavy snow is falling. Ana Fischer is tied to a stake on a pile of kindling, soaked with oil. A large, bound book sits on the pyre with her. Holtz is there with some of his goons (two in the courtyard, two on the walls with guns). The villains make their surprise roll, spot the PCs and combat begins!

After years of playing “modern” D&D, LotFP was brutal and visceral. And while the individual rounds went quick, this combat went pretty long. Most fights in 5^th edition D&D seem to last maybe 3 or 5 rounds. This fight went on for over ten rounds, but it was never boring. The free-form nature of old-style D&D gave my players the liberty to try things they’d never think of attempting in newer D&D. I also used Cavegirl’s“Horrible Wounds” rules, which led to some very gory deaths, some dramatic turn-arounds, and interesting long-term wounds. The combat started off well for the party, but there was a streak of 3-or-4 rounds where the dice just weren’t with them, and no one rolled higher than a 9.

At the start of combat, the party immediately splits (no time for tactical discussions with recently met strangers!). Tranquilo runs out to the courtyard to try and stop Holtz from lighting the pyre. Mortimer the Alice expresses his frustration with the situation and discover a previously non-existent secret door that leads out of the tower and outside of the fort. The rest of the party follow him out this door and start to make their way around the outside wall to where they hear picketed horses.

One tower gunman fires at the outside party, but misses due to range. The other gunman fires at Tranquilo, but also misses. The fighter quickly dispatches one of the Holtz’s sword-goons while the Witchhunter begins casting a spell. “Surrender!” he shouts at the fighter, casting Command. Tranquilo drops his weapons and goes to his knees. One of the goons slaps manacles on him and Holtz lights the pyre. Ana screams, for she only has a few rounds before the flames reach her.

The rest of the party finds the villains' horses and mounts up. Hector, with his high Charisma, even manages to befriend Holtz’s ill-tempered war horse. They spur the horses and charge through the fort gates into the courtyard!

Hector directs his new warhorse to leap over the fire and knock Ana and the stake out of the flames. They succeed, but not well. The horse catches on fire and bucks Hector off. Ana is free of her bonds, but has caught on fire.

Mortimer uses his sword to strike the manacles off Tranquilo, and the fighter lunges at Holtz. They roll around on the ground, locked in combat, but brave Tranquilo has high DEX, but low STR (only a 6!). Holtz’s gets the upper hand, and his thumb crushes one of Tranquilo’s eyes like a grape. The rest of the party is occupied fencing with Holtz’s henchmen and trying to extinguish Ana’s flames.

One of the goons hits Belinda and drops her to 0 hit points, driving his blade in one side of her head and out the other. According to Cavegirl’s Horrible Wounds table, she’s a “dead woman walking” and will die in 2 rounds. “I have a couple of dots in Chirurgy and a fishing kit,” her player asks. “Can I quickly lash my face back together?” The other players think this idea is hilarious, and so do I. Madeline’s player mimics Stewey Griffin with glass in his forehead (“Uh oh! Do I leave it in or take it out??”)

“Okay, I say, but you need to make 2 successfully Chirurgy rolls.” Belinda rolls her dice, and boom, a 1 and a 2. Two successes.

Try not to pick at that, Belinda.

“Okay, so now you have two inches of broken sword blade sticking out of both sides of your head,  

with fishing line and hooks holding your face together. You look kind of like a cenobite. You’re at 1hp, but alive and unconscious.” We all agreed that this was pretty fucking metal, and I don’t regret fudging the rules a bit to make things more metal.

Meanwhile, things are going just as poorly for the rest of the team. Holtz and Tranquilo are on their feet know, going at each other with swords. Holtz gets in a good hit and severs Tranquilo’s arm (I really, really love the Horrible Wounds table). Hector expresses his frustration and the Alice table reveals that he has a small item hidden on his person. We decide that a flintlock pistol is smaller than a breadbox and possible to conceal. The newly discovered gun takes out one of the goons, but another goon slashes the Alice’s guts wide open (100xp to his next character for the first death of the campaign!). Mortimer finally manages to extinguish Ana, who is now horribly burned, unconscious, but at least alive and not on fire. Madeline drags her to the relative safety of the tower.

At this point, it’s pretty much the Holtz and two goons vs Madeline, Mortimer, and nearly dead Tranquilo. The words “TPK” are on everyone’s lips.

Madeline’s grave-robbin’ pick splatters one goon’s head, but the other slices off her arm at the elbow. Mortimer the Alice expresses his frustration is suddenly recalls that the style of breastplate that Holtz wears has a structural defect under the left dorsal arm flap. He’s now +2 to hit the witch hunter and manages to get a light stab in.

Madeline shoves the stump of her arm into the fire and cauterizes the wound. This stops her from bleeding out, but she fails her save and passes out from the pain. Holtz strikes Tranquilo again, and now the fighter’s leg is ruined, along with his arm and eye. But with a surge of adrenaline, the fighter’s sword finally strikes true and kills Holtz.

The remaining goon fails his morale check and turns tail to run. “You have one round to live, Tranquilo” I say. “Do you want to try and bind your wound? You have a 1-in-6 chance.”

“Nope,” he replies. “I’m going to try and go out in style.” He throws his dagger at the fleeing goon, and drops him before he can escape. “From Hell’s heart I stab at thee,” Tranquilo sneers as he dies.

The combat is over, and only three PCs remain alive. Two are brutally wounded, along with NPC Ana.

GM’s Note: Ana Fischer actually is a witch, and really is in league with Lucifer! If the flames had killed her, she would have called out to her dark lord with her last breath and trams formed into a flaming undead monstrosity. This didn’t happen, but now I get to use her as a party complication as she tries to get the PCs under her sway and find a new spellbook. Should be interesting!

At the end of the session, the surviving party members take shelter in the ruined fort and try to mend their wounds. They have found plenty of camping gear, so are relatively comfortable. They also found the witch hunter’s treasure cache along with an annotated map of the surrounding area. Their next move is to make their way to the small village of Nonsbeck. Madeline the grave robber has also heard rumors of the Ghoul Market, and hopes someone there can reattach her arm. They are also debating whether or not to explore the tunnel they found in their jail cell.

Graveyard:

• Tranquilo (Fighter 1)
• Hector (Alice 1)

Treasure Gained:

• 300sp in German thalers
• Large gold and ivory crucifix (worth 500sp, maybe more to the right people)
• Various mundane arms and equipment. 

End Notes:

It's really nice to run some old-style D&D game, and I had a blast running this first adventure. I'm excited to see where my players go next. I'm laying out the groundwork to set them up for The Pale Lady, but it looks like we might take a quick visit to the Ghoul Market first. Of course, Nonsbeck will eventually have some horrible stuff happen to the townsfolk. 

The intro adventure I put together fit nicely on two steno pages. Allow me to share...

LotFP: Ashes of Angles (New Campaign Info)

I’m very excited that I get to start running my new LotFP campaign this weekend. I’ve wanted to run some faux-historical dark fantasy stuff for a while, and I finally convinced my home group to give it a go. My kid (a big fan of Dark Souls and Darkest Dungeon) was very eager to play, and was helpful in getting my other players on board.

Session 0 is this weekend, which will mostly focus on character creation, rules explanations, and setting introduction. I don’t expect any of that to take too long, so we should be able to roll right into the starting adventure in the same session (the PCs will need to escape from a small, 5-room dungeon).

The following is the campaign introduction I shared to my group’s Facebook group. I wanted to make sure my players had a solid idea of what I was shooting for in the campaign. I thought I’d share it here.

Lamentations of the Flame Princess: Ashes of Angels

Campaign Concept: The Holy Roman Empire, Brandenburg, Berlin, 1630. Central Europe has been embroiled in war for 12 years with no end in sight. The conflict that will one day be known as the Thirty Years War started as a clash between Protestants and Catholics and has escalated into a land war between numerous family dynasties wrestling for control of Europe. Unceasing war has led to famine, which has led to disease, which has led to the resurgence of witch hunts. Entire towns have been wiped off the map, and cities lie half-empty. To the average peasant, it very much seems like the world is ending. Maybe it is. Certainly, there are unnatural things crawling through the night and haunting the hidden places of the world.

Player Characters: You are outcasts and refugees from “normal” society. Maybe you’re a last survivor of a ruined village. Maybe you’re a criminal or deserter. Maybe you’re an actual witch. Maybe God talks to you in dreams. Maybe you’re just a woman with strong opinions. Maybe you’re not actually a human. Now you’re trying to survive and make your fortune by any means necessary. The War has uncovered many lost treasures but has also reawakened pagan things that guard them. It’s dirty work for dirty people like you.

System: Lamentations of the Flame Princess by James Raggi. It’s a streamlined and compact version of old-style (B/X) Dungeon & Dragons designed for weird fantasy and survival horror campaigns. Encumbrance and resource management will be important. Combat is dangerous, and healing is slow. Black powder weapons are common, and heavy armor isn’t. I’ve added a number of house-rules and hacks to help fit the system to this specific setting, including reskinning the classical fantasy races to more appropriate options.

Campaign Structure: The campaign will be fairly open and sand-boxy. The PCs start as prisoners thrown together, but after that you will have all of Europe (indeed, the world) to play in. You might choose to become grave robbers, bounty hunters, pirates, or anything else. There will be plenty of adventure and story hooks to latch onto or avoid as you see fit. Treasure = XP in this system, so you’ll always want to keep a lookout for the next big score.

Inspirado:

• Solomon Kane
• Three Musketeers
• A Field in England
• Captain Kronos, Vampire Hunter
• Hammer horror movies in general
• Masque of the Red Death (the Vincent Price movie)
• Flesh & Blood
• Darkest Dungeon
• The Witcher
• Bloodbourne

Random Encounters in Bleak Europe (LotFP)

Ah, now this is the stuff I love doing. Now that I'm back to prepping and running some DIYD&D stuff, I get to make all sorts of cool things that I can share with folks.

My upcoming Lamentations of the Flame Princess game will take place in 17th century Central Europe. The PCs will have plenty of opportunities to travel, so that means I need to put together a random encounters table. Like all good encounter tables, I wanted to make sure the entries helped express the atmosphere and theme of the game world. In this case, it's bleak semi-apocalypse with war, disease, and witchcraft.

When I use this table, I'll probably cross out each encounter after it procs. Even with a d30 list, I don't want to have too many repeat encounters. Gotta' keep it fresh!

These encounters were written with LotFP in mind, but it should work well enough for aby other old-style D&D game.

Download from Google Docs or read below!

Bleak Europe Random Encounters

Check for encounters twice per day while travelling across war-torn Central Europe.

An encounter happens on a roll of a 1 on 1d6.

Roll 1d30 to find out what the PCs have discovered.

1) Pilgrims travelling to an ancient shrine

• 6d6 0-level pilgrims.
• 15% chance of being led by level 1d3 cleric.

2) Bandits

• 2d6 0-level fighters
• 2nd level fighter leader

3) Soldiers travelling to join up with their main force.

• 1d6 x 50 0-level fighters lead by 3rd level fighter (captain), plus 1st level fighter per 50 soldiers (sergeants)
• Roll 1d4
• 1: German
• 2: Swedish
• 3: Danish
• 4: French

4) 2d4 lepers run out of the closest town.

• 0-levels. Save vs. poison each hour of contact to avoid catching leprosy.

5) 1d6 peasants (0-level) digging a mass grave

• Attracts 1d4+1 ghouls at night.
• Ghouls: HD: 2; AC: 14; Rasping tongue +2 (1d6, save vs paralysis or lose Dex equal to damage); Morale: 9

6) Witch Hunter

• 50/50 chance of either catholic or protestant
• Roll 1d4
• 1: Fighter level 1-4
• 2: Cleric level 1-4
• 3: Specialist level 1-6
• 4: 0-level
• Accompanied by 2d4 0-level assistants and guards

7) Ruined Village

• 75% chance of 1d3 rag pickers
• 25% chance of 1d4 ghouls

8) Travelling merchant with wagon and pack animals

• 1d3+1 guards (Fighter 1)
• Selling (roll 1d6):
• 1-4: general goods
• 5: luxury goods
• 6: weapons and armor
• 1d6 x 100sp in cash

9) Travelling performers

• 4d4 actors, musicians, and acrobats
• 20% of Magic User level 1-4

10) Hungry Wolves!

• 2d6 wolves (2 HD; AC: 12; Bite +2 (1d6); Morale 7)

11) Large tree full of 3d30 corpses hanging from nooses.

• 25% chance of attracting 3d6 ghouls at night
• 20% chance of being haunted by marco-spectre
• Macro-Spectre: HD: number of bodies/3, HP: number of bodies; AC: 12; Ectoplasmic torrent +HD to hit (1d12 damage, save or lose 1 from all attributes); Only hurt by magic, silver, or cold iron; Morale: 12

12) Orphans

• 2d6 pre-adolescent children. Lost, frightened, and hungry.

13) 3d6 prisoners of war, crucified along the road. 

• Very much dead.

14) Battlefield littered with the recently dead.

• 1d6 rag pickers
• 15% chance of attracting 2d6 ghouls
• 1-in-8 chance each turn of finding something interesting among the dead soldiers.

15) 1d6x10 refugees. 0-level

• Cold, hungry, and desperate.

16) Ancient cemetery

• 25% chance of containing passage to Ghoul Market
• 20% chance of buried valuable grave goods (2d6x50sp value)

17) Magic User (level 1d6), travelling to visit an associate.

• Accompanied by bonded and disguised demon with HD equal to MU’s level.

18) Dead horse lies bloated in the middle of the road.

• Stomach will erupt with 2d6 deadly snakes (1 HD; AC 12; Bite +1 (1 damage, save or loose 3d6 CON); Morale 7).

19) Dead man hangs from a tree. 

• His crime is branded onto his chest (roll 1d6).
• 1: Rape
• 2: Murder
• 3: Horse theft
• 4: Desertion
• 5: Heresy
• 6: Witchcraft

20) Farm with 1d6+1 family members (0 levels)

• Roll 1d6 for disposition
• 1: Friendly but boastful
• 2: Suspicious and surly
• 3: Fearful and violent
• 4: Superstitious but generous
• 5: Pious but mournful
• 6: Cannibals

21) Band of 1d4+2 deserters. (1st level fighters, morale 5)

• Swords and pole arms, guns but no ammo. Frightened, but not looking for a fight.

22) Bear, maddened by sickness

• HD 5; AC 14; Claw/claw/bite +5 (1d4/1d4/1d6); save vs poison or contract rabies; Morale 10

23) 3 plague doctors (2nd level specialists) travelling to infested village.

• Carry 3d4 bottles of medicine. (15% chance of actually being functional healing potions, 2d4 hp)

24) Man (0-level) pulling a wagonload of corpses

• What's he up to? (Roll 1d6)
• 1-4: Taking the corpses to a nearby mass grave
• 5-6: Taking corpses to sell to a necromancer he knows (level 1d6+3 Magic User)

25) Traveling noble, off to visit a relation in a nearby city

• Level 0 noble, guarded by 1d6+2 2nd level fighters.
• 2d6x100sp in cash, gifts, and jewelry.

26) Hermit, washing his clothes in a nearby stream.

• Level 1-4 cleric. Hair shirt, staff, pet goat, hallucinogenic mushrooms.

27) Eloping Couple

• Young 0-level minor nobles from rival families.
• Horse, 2d6x20sp in cash and jewelry. Bad instincts and no survival skills.
• Perused by bounty hunter (level 5 specialist, 2-6 chance each night of catching up to them).
• Families have each issued a 500sp bounty for their child’s safe return.

28) Old, abandoned windmill

• Decent shelter. 
• 20% chance of being used by 1d4 witches (level 1d4 magic users) to grind children’s bones into meal.

29) Vampire, traveling to new lair.

• 1d6 0-level minions. Horses and wagon with coffin full of grave dirt. Deed to ancient building.
• Vampire: HD: 8; AC: 16; Claw/Claw +8 (1d6, if both claws hit the vampire bites and drains blood for 1d4 CON per round); Only hurt by magic, silver, or fire; Charm Person at will; Vampire powers; Morale: 10

30) Apocalypse Angel, visible a mile away, harvesting souls from (roll 1d4):

• 1: Plague-ridden village
• 2: Famine-ruined farms
• 3: Bloody battlefield
• 4: Mass-suicide
• Apocalypse Angel: HD: 12; AC: 18; Sword of Ruination +12 (4d6, 2 attacks per round); Ashen Gaze (save or disintegrate); Morale 12

Outlanders, Molemen, and Serpentblood for LotFP (Reskinned Classes)

I will soon wrap up my Warhammer 40K: Wrath & Glory campagin and move onto running Lamentation of the Flame Princess. Not surprisingly, it will be set in a weird-fantasy version of Europe at the height of the 30 Years War. Originally I planned on including Dwarves and Elves, describing them as remnants of pagan faerie empires or whatever. I soon decided, though, that while I wanted to keep the demihuman classes I wanted to make them different from the classic fantasy standbys. Reskinning was the way to go--keep the classses mechincally the same (or with slight tweaks) and change all the fluff.

Changing the Halfling to the Outlander was my least creative change. A lot of people have turned the Halfling into some kind of ranger or explorer class. Their bonuses with ranged weapons and natural woodland abilities make this easy. I decided to stick with the precendent and make them "Outlanders," often Native American or African tribesmen, but also buckskinners or mountain men. Mostly, I just thought Mani in Brotherhood of the Wolf was always cool.

For the Dwarf, I still wanted to keep the class hardy and crafty. If I could inject some Hollow Earth weirndess into their subterranean kingdoms, all the better. Molemen were the obvious choice. They are heavily inspired (that is, lifted almost directly) by mole-men John Hodgman writes of in More Information Than You Require. This is not the first time I've stolen his Molemen.

For Elves, I chose to turn them into Serpentblood. I've always loved the Yuan-Ti in D&D, and I've always been fascinated/amused by the hidden reptilian masters of UFO lore. Of course, the Snake Men of Valusia and King Kull were also an influence. These are all the same reasons I brought the Sneaky Snakes into Hobomancer. Also I'm pretty sure Selena from the core LotFP cast is supposed to be half-snake or something. Anyway, replacing elves with decendants of extra-dimensional reptilian sorcerer kings lets me add some weird conspiracy stuff to the campaign.

Here, then, are the class write-ups...

Outlanders

Outlanders are warriors and survivalists specialized for operating in the wilderness and on the frontier--the lands outside supposed "civilization." Many outlanders are from places that Europeans would disparagingly call “primitive”—often uncolonized America or Africa. Some European frontiersmen also qualify as Outlanders (your mountain man or buckskinner types). 

The Outlander is a reskin of the LotFP Halfling class. In most ways they function identically to that class, except that they have no restriction on weapon sizes and only receive the +1 bonus to AC if they are lightly encumbered or less.

Molemen

Molemen are hideous subterranean humanoids with hunched bodies, withered, rodent-like faces, translucent skin, and borderline-heretical beliefs in liberal democracy. They can pass for ugly, stunted humans. Most people just assume they are foreigners from whatever country their homeland hates the most (“Beady eyes, weird teeth… the man’s obviously Welsh”). Molemanic women are just as hideous as their menfolk. High-ranking Molemen often wear powdered wigs. Molemen will introduce this fashion to European nobility in the latter half of the 17^th century.   

Molemen possess a sophisticated culture and civilization deep below the Earth that values industry and learnedlness. Molemanic societies are sexually egalitarian and comprise some of the few functional democracies in these benighted times. Sadly, these subterranean republics are currently experiencing some unspoken catastrophe. Many exiles and refugees have made their way to the surface world. In 1825, the Molemen will form an alliance with the American president, John Quincy Adams, who well lend them aid and arms in an attempt to reclaim the Hollow Earth.

Mechanically, Molemen are a reskin of the LotFP Dwarf class and function exactly like that class, including combat options and carrying capacity. In my campaign, I have gotten rid of the Architecture skill. Dwarves (and Molemen by extension) replace it with Tinkering.

Serpentblood

Serpentblood are descendants of the extradimensional reptilians that once ruled the Earth from the lost empire of Valusia, back when mankind was young. Modern serpentblood little resemble their ophidian forbearers, but often grow more snake-like as they grow in power. Serpentblood are normally raised unaware of their heritage, and the xenogenetic traits often skip several generations. Around puberty, a newly awakened serpentblood is visited in their dreams by their reptilian ancestors, who make them aware of their alien birthrights and direct them towards other of their kin for training. As decendants of alien sorcerer-kings, all serpentblood have a natural talent for magic and combat. Awakened serpentblood have several conclaves hidden in the jungles of South America and central Asia, as well as Greece and the mountains of Romania.

Mechanically, Serpentblood are a reskin of the LotFP Elf class. In most respects they function exactly like that class, including spellcasting and combat ability. They are chaotic in alignment and share the same vulnerability to holy water and the like. Their natural Search ability is due to their semi-functional jacobson’s organs. Serpentblood often become more snakelike as they grow in power. At 2^nd level and each level thereafter, roll a Save vs. Magic (using the saves for the new level). If the roll fails, roll 1d8 on the chart below to determine what serpentine trait manifests. Repeated instances become more pronounced.

1. Eyes become snakelike with slitted pupils.
2. Tongue grows longer and forked.
3. Pigmentation becomes mottled or banded like a snake.
4. Character grows a thin (non-prehensile) tail.
5. Character loses all body hair.
6. Skin becomes scaly
7. Character develops a taste for small birds and rodents, preferably live and whole.
8. Teeth become sharp and fang-like.